NEGATIVITY IS UNHEALTHY. Your body can become addicted to an emotion. So, being negative can be fun. But, its not good. Be positive! Rubber band tech: Wear it. Snap it when you have negative thoughts. Here is a tip: MODELING. Model confident people. Confidence is a stain you can’t wipe off, says Lil Wayne Carter. At least 3 kinds of modeling are available: Someone you know, Someone you admire, and a confidence mentor.

Acting as If is another technique. Don’t worry about outcome so much. Posture is important, so stand up strait, chest high, smile. Speak in a slow, sure voice. DON’T speak so fast! Slow, clear, loud. Eye contact, don’t look down, don’t stare at feet. Well, not yours…

Remember to relax, as I covered in a previous entry. Don’t be twitchy. Breathe in, 15 second breaths. 6 in, 2 hold, 7 out. Calm. Breathe out stress. Tense your muscles, let them go. Relax your muscles. Ground yourself. Breathe, pause, focus.

Recognize your insecurities. Name them. Let them come. Figure out your values. Goals in life. Face your fears everyday. Look and feel best. Take care of yourself. Be healthy. Be thankful for what you have. Seek to give value first. And be prepared! Failing to prepare is preparing to fail.

This isn’t a complicated topic. Confidence is something you can control. If women want to reject you, fine. However, give them the chance to do that, don’t do it yourself. That’s just pathetic.

What is it?

⦁ Nervousness related to sexual actions

Symptoms:

⦁ Approach Anxiety, escalation anxiety, sexual performance anxiety, size anxiety, nervousness related to sexual activity and conversation, touching and situations

Problems it creates:

• Approaching, attracting and escalating interactions with chicks.
• Cripples your game

Where does SA come from?

⦁ Nature Vs Nurture

⦁ Religious background, feminist shaming of male sexuality, etc

How to tell if you have SA

⦁ You worry about sexual inexperience with chicks

⦁ You don’t know if you can satisfy a chick

⦁ Uncomfortable with sexual conversation

⦁ Nervous escalating with chicks

⦁ Nervous expressing interest in a chick

⦁ Sexually unconfident

How to work it out

⦁ Education: Knowledge and experience

⦁ Book recommendations: Guide to Getting it on, My Secret Garden, Sperm Wars

⦁ Build up your sexual experience

⦁ Get comfortable discussing sex

⦁ Fetishes

⦁ Understanding what you like sexually

Beliefs

How are beliefs related to sexuality?

⦁ Beliefs>Actions>Results>Beliefs

⦁ What are your beliefs about sex

⦁ What are your beliefs about relationships

⦁ What are your beliefs about women

Common Bad Beliefs:

⦁ Women don’t like sex as much as men

⦁ Women don’t like to be hit on

⦁ Women want commitment if they have sex with you

⦁ Women only want rich, good looking, connected, guys

⦁ Women don’t like talking about sex

⦁ Sex has to mean something

⦁ Relationships have to be monogamous

Re-Cap

⦁ We discussed Sexual anxiety and how it tanks your game

⦁ We talked about where it comes from and why and how to work on it using a two pronged approach from experience and education

⦁ And we explored the relationship between sexual anxiety and beliefs

Helpful Exercises

• Write down all bad beliefs. Write opposite of beliefs. Beliefs don’t have to be true to be helpful.
• Go to A Strip Club, sit in the front row of the stage and see how long you can keep eye contact with the stripper without looking at her body. If you can do that try to talk to a stripper as long as you can without checking out her body or looking at her in a sexual way…her goal is to get you to crack, try to take back your sexual power.

I hope this was helpful. In the next part, we will cover confidence. For a full website of content like this, type in my username into your web address bar and hit enter. Or see my submission history for a more selective, smaller amount.

We are halfway through this 12 part series of posts. My goal is to make a positive difference in your life.

Learning how to relax isn’t that revolutionary. It’s pretty simple, and something everyone should learn to do. Too much stress is bad for your well being. Luckily, there are some ways to relax. You should be getting enough sleep as well. Sleep is what rebuilds your muscles, and makes you stronger for the next day. If you have a meth problem, try to get it under control. I know it’s not easy- I have been there. That’s for another post though. Here are some ways to relax:

• Breathing Exercises
• Stretching
• Meditation
• Performance Statements (Think to yourself how you need to perform in order to have success).
• Visualizing Success (Visualize what that success looks like).

Those are some basic methods. Let’s talk about some controversial methods.

• Marijuana

My opinion is that if you want to smoke weed, smoke weed. The caveat is that you need a life plan though. Don’t just be getting high without working on yourself. For instance, I partake sometimes. It’s hard not to, I live in the Seattle area.But I make sure I am getting stuff done if I choose to smoke. Some of my blog articles and posts here have been done while high. I used to smoke a lot in college, and would always do homework and assignments under the influence of the herb. For example, in a creative writing class I was taking, I was told my work was the best in the class and acquired A’s all throughout. Nowadays, I have cut back for personal reasons. So it is possible to be productive and smoke weed, but some people will be too lazy. It depends on the person. So only use marijuana if you won’t be a lazy sack of shit.

• Porn/Masturbation
  

This is on here because I know many men consider it “relaxation”. Porn and Masturbation. These two go hand in hand. And if you’re having to choose between this or pot? I would choose the pot! Not even kidding, this shit FUCKS you up if you aren’t careful. I don’t feel the need to explain this one too much. Whereas with pot there are actually positives, there really aren’t any with porn and masturbation. The year is 2019, and I am on a little journey I like to call “No Nut Nineteen”. Yes, that’s right, I just turned 27 on the first of January, and I chose to give porn/masturbation up and give marijuana use some breathing room. People are different, but in my experience, after nutting to internet porn, I have absolutely no interest in going out and interacting with human females. I would much rather watch cartoons like Spongebob and go to sleep. Not even joking. I can’t tell you what to do, but I can advise against it. Maybe you can handle spanking the monkey and feel no change at all in motivation, but for me, it tanks my week. It’s just how I am. And so I choose to bang women, not fake over-paid internet pornstars like Riley Reid who won’t be jumping out of the screen to suck your dick.

• Video Games

God, I love Skyrim. But refer to the marijuana example- have a life plan. Goal(s). Play games as a reward for yourself.

So there you have it. Meditation is your friend. Clear your mind. It can get cluttered. Just don’t clutter it up with more junk like porn by thinking it will actually relax you the right way. It may for a moment, but your mind will be more cluttered than it was.
Which is why I would recommend meditation the most out of everything on here I have mentioned. There are good apps for it, like Headspace. In general, it isn’t too complicated to learn how to meditate. You can even meditate after smoking pot, if that’s your fancy. However, there really isn’t anything better than basic, sober, quiet meditation. If you can learn that, then the world is your oyster.

In Conclusion

A pretty basic concept, relaxation. Too bad many people either don’t relax enough, or relax just a little too much (ehem, porn, ehem).

Relaxation is important for your inner game. So I had to include a dedicated post in this 12 part series focusing on it.

And remember…RELAX!

Approach anxiety is often simply caused by imagining the worst possible scenario in a situation. This is not the best tactic when it comes to interacting with women, or anyone for that matter. Not just approach anxiety, but in other contexts as well. Remember: A core belief of the natural is that “it’s always on”. Even if it’s not “always on”, it’s best to believe it. Nothing drys up women more than an unconfident man.

EXERCISES:

Your Ideal Day

• Visualize ideal day for 10 minutes

Specific Sticking Points:

• Write down top 3 sticking points.
• Visualize all three, and the outcomes that go with them

Goal visualization:

• Visualize main goals, movie style.

Do 10 minutes of visualization daily, alternating between those 3 exercises.

I won’t overload this one. I prefer to keep it simple. No need to write a novel here. A true alpha male is confident and believes in himself. By the way, I am not endorsed but I believe in myself enough to shamelessly say my blog (which is my username) has more content there as well. My post history will have other posts written in this series. There is more to come in this 12 part series, so stay tuned for the next one!

Happy holidays!

Beliefs DO NOT need to be true to be helpful. Replace negative beliefs with positive ones. Here are some common Bad Beliefs:

I’m too old/young/poor/ugly

No you’re not.

She’s out of my league

No she’s not. THERE IS NO FUCKING LEAGUE!!!

I’m not that kind of guy, that’s just not me

Yes you are.

The Madonna–Whore Complex

Women can have both, a sweet, innocent side, and a side that wants to get fucked. Its not always black and white.

Girls don’t like sex

Yes they do.

Girls don’t like to be approached

Yes they do. If even just for the ego boost– yes they do.

Its HARD to pickup girls

No its not.

Hot girls only date guys with looks, money, or both.

Not all of them.

Every girl has a boyfriend

No they don’t.

BELIEFS OF NATURALS:

• Girls love meeting new guys and go out to hook up
• There is no such thing as failure, only feedback
• Its always on!
• Approaches are either fun or boring and I decide
• You never know what a woman is like until you approach her

INNER STATES

• I am an attractive male
• I always, instantly, easily, and confidently, approach women I’m attracted to no matter WHAT the situation is.
• I am ALWAYS cool, Confident, and comfortable, no matter how beautiful a woman is.
• Beautiful women LOVE me and are HAPPY to share me with other women.
• It is TOTALLY normal to have 3somes on a regular basis. People who disagree are just jealous.

How to Practice:

Practice the inner states OUT LOUD IN FRONT OF A MIRROR 3 times a day.

This shit is pretty self explanatory. Don’t make it complicated. Negative Nancies rarely get far in life. Choose to make it positive. Nothing fazes you. Nothing is a big deal.

Next up we will be focusing on getting into the right headspace via mental rehearsal. More content can be found on my site, which is my username dot com, but I will not link it here as I believe it to be against policy for non-Endorsed content creators.

I will see you next time fellas!

You create what you think about

What we keep telling ourselves in our self talk, what we want, what we feel, and what we are, in the form of mental images, create what we experience in life. One of the keys to success is to accept as a habit the fact that you can control your thoughts. You can control and eliminate negative emotions, negative thoughts, and create thoughts that bring you what you do want in your life.

Stop making excuses!

Don’t look for excuses. Don’t blame the situation on women, not being rich, tall, etc. Only when you stop making excuses can you have rock solid inner game.

Before Getting Started… For 3 days, make an inventory of all the thoughts that pop up when seeing a girl you’re attracted to. Literally mark down on a sheet of paper or in a notebook, a mark for each negative self talk. These can be things you said out loud or to yourself. Do that for at least three days. Total it up, and get your percentages of positive-positive self talk, positive-negative self talk, and negative self talk.

Types of Self Talk

There are 4 levels of self talk:

Level 1: The level of negative acceptance, is when you simply say, “Oh, I can’t do that. I can’t. I’m not able to do that. I won’t do that. I don’t know how to do that. I can’t.”

Level 2: Level of recognition and need to change. “Well, I should approach that girl. I need to get laid.” You see, that is a negative/ positive, “I should approach her.” We’re getting towards the right direction, but we are not there yet.

Level 3: Level of decision to change. “I am no longer going to pussy out. I never will wuss out on an approach ever again.”

Level 4: “I am confident around women. I am a guy attractive women want to have sex with.” “I am” is the better version of you.

Eliminating Negative thoughts

Stomp the ANTS. “ANTS” stand for Automatic-Negative-Thoughts. As you’ll see from your inventory most people have about 80 percent negative thoughts and 20 percent positive ones. What we need to do is disrupt these negative thoughts and turn them into positive thoughts. Come up with a way to physically disrupt the negative thoughts, like snapping a rubber band on wrist, pinching self, snapping fingers, etc… Then come up with a default “replacement thought”. Like “Attractive women wanna sleep with me.”

Adopting an Attitude of Unrelenting Positiveness

The baseline of inner game is an overall attitude of optimism and positiveness. There have been literally hundreds of studies on the benefit of a positive attitude. These include longer lifespan, less health problems, higher incomes, etc… Most importantly a positive attitude is MARKEDLY more attractive to women than a negative one. Positiveness is the mental equivalent of having big muscles.

Putting the RELENTLESS in Positiveness

“Nothing is a big deal. Nothing is a problem. Everything ALWAYS works out for me in the end.” This one piece of advice will take you further with women than almost any other piece of advice out there. You must remain positive in the face of any problem or situation that happens with a woman. Your positiveness must be relentless.

3 Magic Questions for staying positive

1. Whats good about this situation/person, etc? 2. What can I learn from this? 3. What is the BEST use of my time here?

Talking Back to your inner voice

Sometimes you will have a negative voice or physical impulse when it comes to approaching women that seems more powerful than you can overcome. The key to dealing with these thoughts is to argue with them, instead of accepting them as true. Remember YOU create your own unconscious thoughts! They are not inherently true and they do not create you!!! Practice talking back when you feel a negative thought or your body telling you, you CAN’T do something.

Putting it all together

Use this knowledge wisely and you will be rewarded for it. From experience, I have been a pretty negative person in past. I used to struggle with depression, but low and behold lifting and eating healthy helped. And I learned firsthand how being positive can work in your favor. Even when nothing seems to be going your way. Wallowing in self pity is no good. And jealousy over other people…other men…women…how does that help you? If anything, it should motivate you. So that guy gets laid a lot and you don’t? That person makes a lot of money and you don’t? Ok, then do something about it. A positive mindset is needed to really make change, otherwise, giving up and throwing in the towel is on the table.

You must not give up. You must be positive and keep fighting the good fight. You are responsible for your own happiness.

If you liked this post, I did do a part I of this series about goal setting, found in my submission history. Stay tuned for the third part within the coming week. I will go over Beliefs, which ties into Relentless Positiveness.

Alright, I’m out!

Welcome to my 11 part series of posts, State of Mind Mastery, where the focus is on developing rock solid inner game. This is the goal post (pun intended). We will call this part “Gateway to Goal Setting”. We have to go through a goal setting process if you intend to improve your current position. Since these kinds of guides have been beaten like a dead horse, I won’t make this too complicated.

A Fork in the Road

If you don’t know where you are going, any road will take you there. When it comes to improvement, whatever you may be trying to improve, you must have clear goals. If you don’t, you could end up spinning your wheels without accelerating. You have to know what would make you happy. Dating MILFs may not be your shindig. Not everyone has to be into Cougars. Dating 18 year old college chicks may not be your shindig either.

Gateway to Goal Setting

You need to set a series of gradually escalating goals. They should be realistic, measurable, and have dates attached to them. I recommend getting a giant paper calendar and writing on it. You need to WRITE the goals down, to enlist yourself with healthy accountability. You will have short term goals, medium term goals, and long term goals.

Small term goals are goals that you can realistically expect to accomplish in 4 to 6 weeks. These can be based on your inner psychology, lifestyle, or skillset. Medium goals are goals you can expect to accomplish in 3 to 6 months. They should be directly related to your small goals. If your small goal is to do one approach a week (that’s 52 women, by the way- a deck of cards!), then maybe you can increase this to approach twice a week, or even once a day if your lifestyle affords it. Long term goals are goals you can accomplish in 6 months to a year. They should be optimistic. You have to be aware of what would need to happen to make it happen, and what would happen if it did happen.

Examples

Here’s an example. Maybe your long term goal is to have a threesome. There are multiple ways for this to go down. Get two girls you’ve slept with in the same room. You can get one by picking up two girls at the same time. You can get one by having one girl and picking up another girl. At some point you’ll need to have at least one girl that’s bisexual. Another goal could be that you want to get married. You’d have to be dating girls and figuring out which one is marriage material, which would obviously be challenging and hard, requiring you to be diligent.

Escalation

It’s important that all these goals follow the rule of escalation! You don’t want to have a small goal of starting approaching and a medium term goal of sleeping with Taylor Swift. The escalation of goals should be like that of steps on a ladder, not teleportation or shape-shifting. So be aware of how well the goal transitions into another goal. It should almost seem seamless, but not too easy of course. Only you yourself can decide what will work best for you, and what will transition well.

An Exercise

An exercise you can do to figure out all your goals would be to get a piece of paper out and spend about an hour writing out EVERY goal idea you have. Think of every possibility, every goal you want to consider rolling with. Once you have thought out everything you could possibly want, narrow it down to your top ten goals. Compare them. Would you rather bang strippers or get married? Would you rather have threesomes or get a long term monogamous girlfriend? You have to figure out what would make you most happy and put your best at the top. Eventually, you will narrow it down to what you want most and have a starting goal to get you going.

Conclusion

I hope this can help you all with your goals! If this gets good reception, I will release a part II for this planned series of posts in around 10 days. The second part will focus on positivity, which is something that can make or break your inner game. Now get to goal setting!

Looks

The first facet of the attraction trinity is the looks facet. Looks are not the end all be all. However, we’ve went too far in the other direction. Men are fed feel good statements like “It’s on the inside that counts”, “Don’t judge a book by it’s cover”, and “Looks don’t matter”. Heres the thing: They do matter. At least a little bit. Yes, it is true that men are more visually driven than women are, and that attraction for women is built on more than just looks alone. To actually believe that they don’t matter at all to women is simply delusion. Luckily, it’s not too hard to be at least average looking. Being well put together is an attainable goal.

1. The first thing you can do is start lifting. Being fit and having a low body fat is the easiest way to boost the looks stat. Having low body fat will increase vascularity, and help to chisel out your jawline. Decide if you need to bulk or cut. Are you too skinny right now? Too fat? Figure out where you stand and go from there. Stronglifts 5X5 is a great program to get you started, and there are many others too. You’ll have to get your diet in check too…
2. Eat healthier. You are what you eat, as they say. If you’re bulking, you’ll need to eat more calories than you burn. If cutting, you’ll need to eat less calories. If maintaining weight, you’ll need to eat just the right amount. You should have a good balance of protein, carbs and fats in your diet. Contrary to popular belief, fat doesn’t make you fat, eating too many calories and not working out make you fat.
3. Dress Better. You can go from unattractive to attractive just by doing this. I’m serious. Figure out which colors work well for you. Try going outside your comfort zone. Where form fitting clothes. You shirts should compliment your body, not override it. V-necks, henleys, plaid, etc are things to consider. Pinstripes make you look taller, but horizontal stripes make you look wider. Maybe avoid those unless you’re sure it works for you. I used to wear horizontal stripes all the time in high school (blue pill days), but rarely do I now, if ever. If you wear glasses, see if contacts will work. Glasses can be good, but it depends on the type. Accessories can help put a spark in your style (necklaces, watches, etc.).

Money

The second facet of the attraction trinity is that of money. No, women aren’t all gold diggers. But money is still important. Many women most certainly WILL judge you based on the car you drive, and stuff like that. Besides that, without money you can’t afford healthy foods and it would be hard to bulk. I’ve tried bulking broke before and I always hit a pothole. Food is expensive. Especially good, healthy, testosterone boosting foods. Also. without money, how are you gonna afford gas? What about dates? Sure, women will pay for your drinks and food sometimes (I had a plate do that for me when we first met off Tinder at the bar) but eventually, women will wonder what up and why you never seem to be able to afford anything. Money is not the end all be all, but it is still a part of the Looks, Money, and Status attraction trinity. So lets go over some pointers on acquiring it.

1. Figure out what you’re good at. You don’t want to be stuck in a job that you hate, trust me. I’ve been there and done that. In fact, it’s why I started blogging. I enjoy writing, I enjoy helping people, and so I am on that path. Are you good with computers? Do you like programming? I know a guy making six figures working as a tech engineer, which involves SQL programming. Web developers make good money too, as do game developers. If you like computers, there are tons of options out there, including starting your own blog (which by the way, is an investment since it’s not a guaranteed pay check.) Maybe you like being on the road? I hear UPS drivers make six figures as well. For so many things, you do not need to be a college graduate. Figure out what you’re good at and see whats out there that can use your skill.
2. Get REALLY good at what it is you like. For me, acting/filmmaking has always been my dream outside of writing. I have taken acting workshops with professional television actors/actresses, and been on many auditions. I was in the drama club at Church as a child, and did theater all throughout high school and college. If you want to become a hireable candiate for something, it will take work. You have to get good at what it is you are already good at. Does that make sense? You should always strive to improve. Getting paid for your skill should be a walk in the park if you are truly dedicated to it.
3. Don’t spend money on shit you don’t need. Learn how to save. Seriously. I’ve wasted so much money on stuff. I’ve also went into debt. I know what it’s like. Got my first credit card and fell into a hole. I’m warning people not to make the same mistakes I did. Treat yourself when you feel you’ve truly earned it.

Money is my biggest weakness of the attraction trinity. It’s the one thing I still struggle with to this day. But from what I’ve learned, this is advice that would have helped me if I followed it sooner. So lets move on to the final facet of the attraction trinity.

Status

Status is the final facet of the attraction trinity model. And much of the time, status is highly correlated with money, since status can be attained from having a career too. If I was a famous actor, surely I would have status from that right? Or what if I was a famous author like Stephen King? Surely I’d have status then too right? Get the picture? Now, status CAN be job induced. It can also be a host of other things too. Status is often contextual. Perhaps you’re the best blackjack player this side of the Mississippi river. And everyone knows it. Or maybe you’re a really good pool player. Or baseball. Lets dive in.

1. Similar to the money facet, get really good at something. Perhaps it’s directing movies or making music. If you are really good at something and put it out there, people will notice.
2. Become an authority figure at something. This ties into point one.
3. Maintain your status. Always know your competition.

Status hugely ties into the money facet. It’s always worthwhile to combine the two. Status isn’t always easy to get or maintain either. Stay on your toes.

And this wraps up my brief guide to the attraction trinity model. In the future, assuming this is received well, I may dive more in depth on each of these and really go all out with strategies for each facet. Perhaps each facet will get it’s own, informative post. For now, I hope this can set you in the right direction. All of these facets put together will make or break your SMV, and are the core of your game. The middle of the triangle is game.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Somebody give that girl a medal.

According to the official Wikipedia page for “rape culture”, Rape culture is a sociological concept used to describe a setting in which rape is pervasive and normalized due to societal attitudes about gender and sexuality.

And, according to feminism, there is, in fact, a rape culture in the west.  I’m going to explain why this is bullshit.

If there was, we would have “rape parades” to celebrate rape, wouldn’t we?  I bet we would even have a magazine called “rape weekly” which would feature a rapist of the month and have excerpts on how to rape properly.  Rape would be considered a good thing in society, not a bad thing.

And yet, I don’t see rape parades.  Instead, I see slut walks.  Now, you could argue we live in a slut culture.  I wouldn’t argue that.  I enjoy the occasional slut every now and then.  Being a slut is now something to be celebrated.  Thanks feminism.  Even a broken clock is right twice a day.  Guess what?  Being a rapist isn’t.  It never was, at least in the west.

Feminism has tricked men.  They have tricked men into thinking there is a rape culture and that you need to act as if you are walking on glass when it comes to interacting with women, or else.  So much as looking at a woman the wrong way is objectification, which apparently means raping a woman with your mere eyes.  Who would have thought that was possible, huh?

This message harms men (and women, for that matter) more than you might think.  I wasted my high school years believing feminist ideas like these and for that reason I did horribly with women back then, mostly because I felt ashamed for having sexual desires for attractive women – like I was a part of “rape culture”.  Looking back at those years where I actually took feminism seriously, I cringe.

So lets go deeper into this “rape culture” myth.  To me, it’s actually sort of funny that feminists would choose to hold slutwalks in opposition to rape culture if we do so live in a rape culture.  Why?  Well, because, if we live in a culture where rape is ok, where it’s the “norm”, something NOT taken seriously, then why dress up like a slut and ADVERTISE it on the streets?  I mean, if we live in a culture where rape is commonplace and normal, part of our culture, then aren’t you sort of ASKING TO GET RAPED if we do so live in a culture where rape is considered A-OK?  Thats like being a Deer and putting a target on your back just asking for something that is apparently a part of “our culture”, according to feminism.

The simple fact of the matter is, there is no rape culture in the west.  Period.  Feminists can continue telling everyone there is but thats not going to make it anymore true either.  Rape is not something socially acceptable in our society.  It’s not celebrated and if even accused of it, your reputation and social standing can be ruined instantly.  If rape was considered ok and we did live in a culture in which rape was normalized, then being accused of being a rapist wouldn’t be such negative thing like it is.

Rape culture is not real, not in the West.  Sure, in some 3rd world countries maybe it might be closer to reality.  But as it stands now, there is no rape culture in the west.

So don’t be ashamed for having a penis.  Its ok to have sexual desires.

Just don’t rape anybody.